After nearly two months of avoiding most social outings and contact with people in general, I started easing up a bit when Charlotte started easing into Phase 1 of reopening. I definitely felt unsettled – and as if I was doing something wrong. It’s crazy how two months of anti-social behavior can reset your sense of normalcy. In the span of a week, I went jogging with a female running group, drove to Hilton Head to visit my parents and stopped in Columbia to visit my brother.
It felt like a lot. It felt too soon for the running group – yes, we were outside and mostly staying apart, but you inevitably cluster at red lights when you’re waiting to cross a street. Also I was overwhelmed by the narrowness of the greenway we cut through, and the number of people also out there for their own runs. (Later, it was brought to my attention that this kind of outdoor exposure-in-quick-passing situation is super low-risk, so I’ve since felt a bit better about it. But still would like to not be on the greenways for a while.)
The being with my family again? The hug-lessness felt weird and sad, but it felt really good to see them again. (Also my masked mother hugged me right before I got in my car to drive back to Charlotte and I cried. My husband is the only one who’s touched me in two months. And I love him to death, but still. I miss all the hugs.)
Being around people again has made me feel more myself, and human, in general. So I’ve enjoyed a few other “outings,” with some social distancing involved. Getting out even in limited ways while doing my best to be socially responsible (can more people please wear masks in stores?) has felt amazing. Here’s what I’ve been up to:
Trader Joe’s dates
My reentry into masked grocery shopping after a month of not going to the store drove my anxiety sky-high. Most people at Publix weren’t wearings masks, they were clogging the aisles, they were too close – hated it. But I asked Rémy if he’d start going on weekly masked Trader Joe’s dates with me (they’re so much more strict there and I Love It), just so I could start enjoying grocery shopping again. Because I adore moving through the aisles and stocking up on exciting foods and staples. I don’t want to lose that little pleasure. The weekly dates totally work.
Home Depot excursion
The two of us also stopped at Home Depot after a weekly grocery run to return a curtain rod and browse the shelving and plants. The wide-open-space situation in there was perfect – not over-crowded. We spent a lot of time looking at trees (specifically Chinese palms; they’re gorgeous), since we’re playing with adding a small tree line in lieu of updating our existing chain-link fence. It seems ideal to lean toward savings mode during a pandemic.)
Parking lot/takeout hangouts
My yoga friends and I have reimagined our previous weekly hangouts at Pizza Peel – we used to grab a late dinner and split some drinks after my Thursday night yoga class. And we’ve missed that. Now, we grab Pizza Peel takeout one night each weekend and circle our cars in a parking lot for a makeshift, distant picnic. Our spouses join, too. It’s been a good way to get some face-time in.
Wine and cheese night in the backyard
Rémy crafted two epic cheese boards, as he does, for two of our friends. (Our weekly Trader Joe’s haul helped.) They brought wine and their puppy. We all set up in the backyard for the night, for our double date. And everything almost felt normal.
Really, doing anything near my people, where I don’t have to be stuck inside where I work all day, has been liberating. And I know everyone is figuring out their own comfort levels right now with social interaction while still being socially responsible. But this all has made me feel a lot more human. A lot more like myself.
Are you giving yourself permission to adjust the way you need to?